Thinking of You
by redblacklister
Summary: What if Liz let Red go at the end of the episode 22? Lizzington. One-shot.


**Note: **_Unfortunately I own nothing. I don't own The Blacklist, nor Red, Liz and Dembe. The all belong to NBC and the genius Jon Bokenkamp. _

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"**You can turn away and run from it. You can hide from it. And if you choose to do that, I'll fly away. ****Or you can face it ****and confront it.****.****. ****engage it.****And maybe****... ****maybe****... ****you prevail and rise above it.****"** Red stopped talking and waited for Liz to say something, to answer is hidden question. Liz nodded to him. Here he had the answer and it was _'no, I won't do that._'

"**I understand.****"** He gave her a sad smile and she did the same. **"****I'll be on a plane tonight.****"**

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Some hours later, Red was in his plane, somewhere above the Atlantic Ocean, going to Paris. He had some business matters to deal with in there. He had a glass of scotch on his hand, and some documents on his lap that he had to see before the meeting with some associate, but he couldn't keep focus on that, all he could think about was Liz.

Red would never see her again, hear her voice, touch her, comfort her, protect her, and that was killing him inside.

Some months ago, after Frederick Barnes died, he said to her that if she wanted he would disappear, and if she had answered 'yes', it would be a thousand times easier. Well, maybe not that much, but would be easier.

He was now used to see her everyday, or at least talk to her, even though it is just to talk about a blacklister it was more than good to talk to her.

He traded his life multiple times to keep her safe, and if he had to, he would do it again, and again, the times that would be necessary, and he would never regret it.

In that moment, Berlin was somewhere trying to find him and kill him but that doesn't matter, the worst thing that could happen, had already happened, loose his Lizzie.

The task force, the 'Blacklist' were now ending, but that doesn't matters anyway. Catch blacklister without Liz doesn't make sense. Nothing makes sense now.

Nothing.

Dembe approached Red with a phone in one hand. "Raymond." Red slips the thoughts away and looked at him with his eyebrow raised. "A call for you."

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Next morning Liz woke up at ten o'clock and started getting dressed to go talk and tell him that everything was over, and Red had disappeared.

"WHAT?!" Cooper didn't reacted well to what Liz had just told him "How did he disappeared?!"

"Sir, I told him that don't want to work with him anymore, he killed my father!"

After some minutes of trying to make A.D. Cooper understand their decision, Liz headed to her office and started packing her things.

"Hey Keen, glad you're here!" Ressler was near the door with an excited face, that fast changed to a confused look. "What the hell are you doing?"

Liz looked at Ressler with an apologized look. "I'm done."

"What you mean, you're done?" Ressler stilled confused.

"I can't keep working with Reddington. The task force… we're done. I'm sorry."

Ressler gave her and understanding looking and other thing that Liz couldn't indentify. "You did what you had to done."

Tears started to appear in Liz's eyes, and she didn't know why. Maybe because she was quitting her job and left behind amazing co-workers and the dream of a success career, or maybe because she will never work with… _No, Liz. It's not that, he killed your father… don't forget about that!_

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Red had already arrived Paris for three hours. He was now with his associate in Saint James hotel, trying to make a deal, that probably would be broken and Red's associate would end up dead, but Red wasn't concern about that, he wasn't even playing attention for what the man was saying to him, he was thinking about Liz.

Thinking if she was still working with him, he could've said that he needed her for a undercover work and take her to Paris, she would be there sitting next to him, watching him making deals and after that all, he would take her to have a meal at L'Ambroise on Palais de Bourges.

Red's head was miles away from there, and his associate had noticed it. "Reddington, are you listening to me?"

Red looked at him confused. "Excuse me?"

The guy stood up for is comfy chair, furious. "I'm finding someone else do to the job." He said with his French accent "You're not paying attention for what I say!" The guy continued to grumble while he was climbing the stairs.

"Damn it!" Red stood up furious on his incapacity on focus himself. Being far from Liz was making vulnerable, and that couldn't happen.

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Liz arrived home with a box with all the few things she had on her office and all the profiles of the blacklisters they caught, and Red's profile. It should be classified be they had a dozen of photocopies of them, so Liz wasn't worry with that. She placed the box on the counter of the kitchen and the bag with food she had bought in way home.

She took the containers with Chinese food from its bag and took from the box all the profiles.

Liz sat on floor of the living room and rested her head on the couch. She stared to eat while she was passing the profiles.

Ranko Zamani.

Floriana Campo.

The Freelancer.

She continued to search in the pile of profiles the one she wanted.

Frederick Barnes.

Ivan.

The Kingmaker.

Eureka! Raymond Reddington.

Liz opened the profile and started to read it for the hundredth time. The same photos. The same dates. The same words. And almost nothing made sense. That profile wasn't a profile; it was a compilation of lies and evidences.

Suddenly Liz started thinking of all the things they have done together. Thanks to Red, the task force saved so many lives. And Red himself saved Ressler's life when he got shot on his leg. Not to talk about the time he saved Liz.

From Wujing when Liz's cover was almost unraveled.

From melting in Stewmaker's chemicals. And the thanks Liz gave him was calling him a monster.

He traded his lives for hers when Anslo Garrick point a gun to her head…

Liz should be very thankful for what he had done. Well, she was. She really was.

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Liz woke up with the sunlight creeping in her skin. She had forgotten to close the curtain last night.

She sat on bed and stretched like a cat and looked at the clock alarm on her bedside table and saw that it was 8.15 a.m. so she had slept only a few hours as had been normal on last weeks.

Liz stood from the bed and went to bathroom and ten minutes later she had already take a shower. After that Liz, with a towel wrapped around her, headed to her bedroom again so she could get dressed. She decided that she would dress her pajama again and would only dress if she needed to exit home.

Liz stepped down the stairs and headed to the kitchen. She open the fridge and toke a Tupperware with fruit salad that contain strawberry, banana and other fruits.

She sat on the sofa, turn on the TV and start watching the news. It was talking about a kidnapping of a woman that was owner of one of the best companies of lawyers in DC and Liz ask herself if it was a crime of another blacklister, and if it was, Red would be calling… _how did you forgot about that Liz… you're not working with him, for already two weeks! Wait… two weeks?! It had passed already two weeks?! _

The days seem to passed so quickly, but it did look like it was taking years for the days to over. Since Red had gone, Liz was just crawling through the days, doing nothing without watch Netflix series, read, trying without success to cook her meals.

She then remembered when Red took something for her to eat when she was on Tom's evidence board.

When Liz needed he was always there. Liz started to see those moments in flashbacks.

When Tom was on Post Office being questioned about the gun, the passports and the money on that damn box that Liz found. He was there, when Liz thought her whole world was falling apart, when she didn't knew on who she could trust. He grabbed her hand and pulled her a little more closer. **"You can trust me."**

When Sam died, he was there to comfort her. **"Tell me some stories." **He gave her a smile that she couldn't help but smile too. And they both sat on the swing set while she talked about Sam. Liz never thought he could be so good listener; he was always talking and interrupting when others were talking…

When he was gone, he called her just to tell her that he would always help her. **"Lizzie I want you to know, wherever I am, whatever I'm doing, if you're in need, I will be there."**

When she was undercover. She was scared if something wrong happen, no one could save her. They were talking about Madeline and he stepped down the stairs. **"Wow."**… Looking sexy in a damn Tuxedo saying that he was her plus one. He could only be kidding. If Liz had a pen, she would stab him in his neck again, but this time, she would let him die. **"You have me. And I'm not going to let anything happen to you." **She had no reaction beside smile while tears came streaming down her face. Some minutes later they were dancing together, their finger touching, his hand on her waist, giving her instructions. **"You're not a cop tonight, you're a criminal… Just be yourself." **She got caught, and he saved her.

When she finally discovered that Red was right about Tom. He spent days restoring a music box, and when it began to play, when Liz start crying, he pulled her to a embrace. **"…To know that everything is going to be okay…" **His breathing on her head. His kiss on her hair. His arms around her. **"You're going to be okay." **

Liz was now crying for being so selfish, she had once asked him if he had ever had a selfless moment in his life. Well, he had so many only because of her. Who seem to never had one was Liz, and she was feeling so bad of her behavior with him. He deserved better than that.

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Red was playing cards with Dembe while listening to Jazz in the living room of the safe house Red own in Paris.

"That's not fair!" Red said to Dembe smiling, in this moment only Dembe could make Red smile, but just the thought of Lizzie to make that smile disappear. "You're cheating!"

Dembe open his month to speak when he felt the cell phone vibrating on the pocket of his jacket. "It's Agent Keen."

Red quickly took the phone from his hand.

"Hello Lizzie."

His voice. His tone, always different for the other and always a low tone when it come to Liz. _They should call him 'The man of the Thousand Tones' instead of 'The Concierge of Crime'! _Liz thought

"Hello Red." She finally spoke, trying to disguise that she was crying.

He smile has he always do when he hear Liz calling his name.

"Are you okay?" Red asked concern and relieved for hearing her voice again.

"Yes." Liz could hear his sight of relief. "I mean… no." _Liz, no…. What are you doing?!_

"What happened? Someone hurt you? Are you hurt?" _Stupid! How could you forgot about Berlin?! He should be after her!_

"No… I just… I miss you Red." Red's jaw dropped open.

"Excuse me? What was that last part again?" Red was a two hundred watz smile.

_The bastard wants to hear me saying that again. Next time you wont have such luck. _"I've been thinking and... I act wrong with you, and I never thought I would say this but... I miss you."

"So I guess I'll see you tonight."

"Yes, please. And thank you." Liz smiled with the idea of seeing him again.

Red hang up the phone and gave it to Dembe. "Call Rogers and tell him to prepare the plane."

"What's the destination?"

Red smiled. "Back to Lizzie."


End file.
